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The latest from Parent land this week

Updated: Oct 6, 2020

Laughter is the best medicine ( apparently ), and it's certainly true that you feel a lot better after a chuckle, snort or even a mild guffaw. We also know, because we say it countless times a day that 'sharing is caring' so here is something we laughed our socks off at this week. Plus other gentle noises from Parent land.

You're welcome...

Beyonce dancing to Thomas The Tank Engine

The amazing, the spectacular, the Mumma we would love to live as ( well at least for a few VIP - Fabulous hours ) dances to the little engine that could. This is especially sweet if like us, you have spent hours listening and playing with your little boy ( or girl ) in Thomas, Cranky the crane etc land.

Sometimes life doesn't turn out how we planned...

It's easy to get caught up in the everyday waves of raising humans in our busy world. You have a baby, your life turns upside down, you adapt, you manage, you slowly come to terms with the fact that parenting is about moving through stages ...crawling, walking, nursery, school, college and, (hopefully) beyond. This is not every parent's experience of course. Sometimes, life doesn't turn out how we planned. This post by Melanie Dimmitt is in turns unbearably sad and incredibly uplifting, and a great reminder to every parent to stop fearing the future.

Antidotes to the obsessions that come with a child's disability

by Melanie Dimmitt, author of Special, writing for The Tot

"I start with the fat orange pill, snapping it in two with the tip of a thumbnail and dropping its halves into the worn, unadvisedly dishwashed plastic cup. Next is the tiny white pill – only a quarter, always jagged and uneven, but it will do. Profanities as a grain or two hit the floor. The back of a teaspoon grinds both pills to dust. 

We’re not done yet. 

Now for the small white capsule, the careful twist of its tubular shells, the spilling of its powder – always a little lost to the counter. Then the silver sachet of yellow granules, torn open, tipped over. And a final flourish – two drops of ‘sunshine’ from a brown glass bottle marked Vitamin D3. 

Serve over cereal steeped in boiled water, a dollop of lavish – and crucially, thick – yogurt and there you have it. My four-year-old son’s breakfast. A heavily medicated mix that will see him through – hopefully, seizure-free – until lunch. 

I did not expect motherhood to make an apothecary of me. Nor did I expect to gain vicarious degrees in physio, occupational and speech therapy. Or learn the meaning of words like dystonia, hypertonia and aspiration – of acronyms like EEG, GMFC and SEN". 

Like every other healthy set of parents-to-be, poised for the next step of our so-called normal lives, my partner and I had banked on your stock-standard, run of the mill, ‘nothing to see here’, baby. 

“We did not expect his heart to stop beating in the birthing suite. Or the frantic rescue mission into my uterus that would save him, but leave his brain severely damaged.”

‘We’ll have to wait and see what this means’, said the doctors. ‘He’ll be fine’, we insisted. Six months later, our son, Arlo, was diagnosed with quadriplegic cerebral palsy. 

Now four and a half, with epilepsy added to his medically complex credentials, Arlo is a non-mobile, non-verbal little guy who needs a great deal of assistance to move, eat, drink and participate in pretty much everything. He’s also smart, sensitive and thoughtful with a zest for life that could rival that of the purple, blue, red and yellow Wiggles combined.

He’s everything to me. More than I could ever have hoped for. But in the early weeks and months that followed his diagnosis, the prospect that he might never walk or talk – and a future clouded with uncertainty – were hard pills to swallow".

To read more go to The Tot 

Waiters will judge you, so always leave a big tip

If we had a pound for every way we could judge ourselves and each other on our parenting skills we would be Bill-and-Melinda-Gates-rich...

"Smart Parenting: The Waiter test

by Zaid Mohamed

A LONG time ago, I worked as a waiter while waiting for my exam results to come out. It was both a fun and horrid experience as I was serving all kinds of people. There were those who were very nice, always smiling and courteous. But also quite a number who were horrible and rude.

Looking back, I value the experience as an important part of my life's journey. I recall a nice gentleman who was concerned about my "career" choice of becoming a waiter. He encouraged me to study hard and maximise my potentials. When I explained that it was a part-time job, he congratulated me for being hardworking.

Yet, there are many waiters and waitresses out there who don't have the choice that I had. They have to put up with all sorts of people. Someone recently sent me a poster that says, "A person who's nice to you but rude to the waiter (or waitress) isn't a nice person." Do you agree?

How a person treats a waiter or waitress can reveal a lot about his or her character. There's a concept called "The Waiter Test". This test basically works by revealing an insight into a person's true character based on how they treat restaurant waiters (or waitresses), or other customer service staff.

For example, during a dining outing, the waiter messes up your order. A kind and patient customer would remain in the positive zone by trying to understand the situation. The waiter may be overworked and tired. He probably didn't make the mistake intentionally.

However, an arrogant and rude person wouldn't miss the opportunity to scold the poor waiter. A person's true colour is usually shown when he or she is hungry and angry. The easiest target is the waiter.


Now, bringing this into the context of parenting, we should ask ourselves, which type of personality would come out if we were to face a similar situation? Would we be the forgiving person or the angry one? Only we know the answer.

Perhaps at the beginning of our relationships, we display our best behaviour. But we must remember one thing. As we cruise into the comfortable phase of our life together, our masks may come off if we're not genuinely kind to begin with. This is when we'll witness a "kind" father turning into a monster, or a "caring" mother becoming an abuser".

Read more at New Straits Times

4. And finally... If Birds had arms

Many is a long walk in the park with the little ones that we ponder life's greatest mysteries. Like why do their previously worrying symptoms vanish the second you get them into the Doctor's surgery, or what would happen if birds had arms...

More big questions will be asked and ( hopefully) answered next Monday when we will once again reach out and touch the weird place we're calling Parent land.

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